Memories

MEMORIES

I remember when she first came to the Grammar School after her victory. On the corridor of the second floor at the last window there was a small delve in the wall. Some of the girls, including myself, ensconced there and were listening to Csilla's talk about the contest with liquid eyes. She was so happy! And she was very excited because she did not know what the other students and the teachers would say. At that time she was only a shy girl. Even so, this picture of Csilla is dearer to me than the one I saw in Pretty Girls, when she was sitting by the swimming-pool of the hotel in Vienna, alone, with tears in her eyes.

One of Csilla's grademates
20th January, 2004

I knew her, or else the Molnár family. Her mother, Marika, is still my good friend. Unfortunately, a couple of years have passed since then but I still remember clearly that early autumn day.

Whenever Csilla came to Budapest, she stayed with us. On that certain day there was a press conference in Hotel Béke, which was considered to be a very elegant place at that time. Before leaving, she wanted to roost for a while but asked me to wake her up after about an hour. I opened the door and what did I see?
Csilla was sleeping while sitting on a chair so as her make-up and beautifully made hair to remain untouched the whole family admired her on tiptoes because we rarely saw such a beautiful phenomenon.

Then she asked my husband, who was cutting the grass in the garden, to take her to Hotel Béke. Miklós, who was wearing shorts at home, took her to the city, parked the car opposite the hotel and said: "I'm sorry, Csilla, but I won't get you over the street in lawnmowing dress." Then Csilla got out of the car smiling and, to quote my husband's words "she was so beautiful that she didn't have to wait for the traffic lamp to change green. The traffic stopped on the boulevard by itself. She was wearing a red costume, red shoes and my white blouse. (I only mention this because I'm very proud of it.)

M. Toldy
22nd January, 2004

I didn't know Csilla.
I saw her once, talked to her a few sentences then a couple of hours later

The restaurant of the Molnár family in Fonyód was a notion among the artists being on tour in the country. It was an irresistible station due to wonderful tastes and love we got there.

We were on tour around Lake Balaton with György Korda and Klári Balázs's concert. On the 9th July,1986 we stopped in Fonyód to have lunch and to refresh ourselves. MArika welcomed us at the entrance and, probably by chance, Csilla also appeared on the staircase leading upstairs. She greeted us with the smile of recognition of Gyuri and Klári then with her mother she sat down at our table.

I had very little time to think about why this beauty, who is charming even in her simple appearance, is so sad. In a few minutes we got the image of what grind indignity Csilla and her family have been passing through since the success almost every day. Many people wrote about it many things but in their contents they were very little.

I think it happened to resolve the sorrow that Gyuri kindly invited Csilla to the concert in Balatonboglár, which was held the following day. He offered to pick her up and to take her home after the programme. Csilla was glad about the invitation and they agreed to pick her up at 4 o'clock the following day.

Next day Gyuri and Klári arrived late at the concert, without Csilla. They told us that Csilla had taken medicines a few hours before and she hadn't been able to be saved but if an ambulance suitable for life-saving had been sent and the staff was crying.

Imre Matus
7th February, 2004

I had known Csilla since her early childhood. She was a lovely, cheerful, cute little girl. Even that time her readiness to help, her humane behaviour towards anyone were conspicouos. She kept these features when she grew up and after becoming a Beauty Queen. She was never conceited, even after the contest. She talked about the contest and the participation in Malta happily, emphasising how many beautiful girls she had met there, too.

I'm glad I had the chance to know her and I could also be a part of the last period of her life in which I saw her cheerful and happy.

Since she's gone these contests mean something else to me, maybe because these contests became uninteresting due to the tragic outcome of Csilla's life. Perhaps because, without hurting anybody, I have never seen such a beautiful, honest girl like Csilla in any other contests.

Regards,

Erika G. Juhász
Fonyód
13th February, 2004

I've known Csillu nearly since her childhood. With her mother, Marika, we've been best friends till today. I saw her growing up, I saw how she turned from a cheerful, always smiling girl into a beautiful, tall and slender woman. She was known as a most kind, cute, polite and helpful little girl. When we learnt that she was going to take part in the contest, we kept our fingers crossed for her during the semifinals and we were happy about her successes with all our hearts. On the day when the final was held my family was sitting in front of the TV set and we were waiting for the final results with great excitement. I was crying for joy and we were much proud of her success. 'Fame' didn't make her bumptious, perhaps she became more modest; glory didn't hit her head. I think she couldn't cope with her sudden popularity. She behaved absolutely naturally afterwards, she was as kind and lovely as before.
Our conversations often come to my mind even these days or when she said once during our dialogue " I'm extremely hungry, I haven't eaten anything today" and saying goodbye she popped into Delta to have a toasted sandwich. But I not only saw her happy eyes, I saw her sad look as well.
Occasionally she had confidence in me and talked about many events which hurt her. Her death affected me and my family profoundly. My heart still sinks if an article is issued or a TV programme is broadcast about her.
Several years and several pageants passed by. It must derive from my partiality that I haven't seen a graceful Beauty Queen marching with such a simple naturalness like her and I do not intend to hurt any of the Beauty Queens. For me she was the BEST so far
Marika and I have been talking about Csilla a lot and remember events, which meant common experiences. After so many years, the sorrow felt for her death is still there in my heart.

Éva S.
Fonyód, 16th March, 2004

Dear Erika Fanta and Diána Lujza Tóth,

I came across Csilla's homepage yesterday and the night occurred to me immediately when I had the chance to meet her and talk to her for about 40 minutes.

In the daytime I attended the Technological College, at night I drove a taxi for FőTaxi. It was a pouring rainy night at about 10 or 11 o'clock when a tall girl in raincoat hailed me on the corner of today's Podmaniczky street and Teréz Boulevard.

She didn't tell me the exact address, she only said I didn't have to take her home. We should have gone to a certain restaurant somewhere in District XII or II (As this event happened 19 years ago and I haven't been to Hungary since 1989 I forgot both the name of the restaurant and the name of the street where it was.).

When she got in the car, in spite of the raincoat, it was easy to realise that my passenger was very pretty.

After driving off I looked at her a few times because I had the feeling I had already seen her somewhere before or at least she reminded me of someone. We were driving on Margit Bridge when it suddenly hit me: she resembled the Beauty Queen very much.

Finally I couldn't help it longer and said to the girl who was sitting in silence: " Have you eve been told you look like the Beauty Queen?" She was smiling pleasantly and replied: "I have, as I am the Beauty Queen."

Her response surprised me so much that I was sitting there gaping. Suddenly everything in the outside world stopped existing for me including time and space. Many seconds must have passed until I finally shut my mouth and I was able to say:" Really?" "Yes", she answered, still smiling. At that moment I thought I was the luckiest taxi diver in the whole world that the Beauty Queen hailed MY car.

When we got to the restaurant Csilla looked out of the window then turned to me:"Are you sure we are at the right place? The area doesn't seem to be familiar to me." I said: "I am because we are at Búsuló Juhász (Sorrow Sheperd) Restaurant." "But I didn't say Búsuló Juhász but" and she said another restaurant. (I can't recall the name of that restaurant.) Then I stared open-mouthed that how I could have mistaken the street and the name of the restaurant so much?! I was very embarrassed, apologized, struck the taxi-meter and drove off to the right direction. For doing this we had to come down from one of the mountains in Buda and go to another one.

My explanation for missing the address is that when I heard my passenger was the Beauty Queen everything got confused in my brains including the destination.

Another 20 minutes later we got to the 'right' restaurant somewhere at the end of Hűvösvölgyi street. (I can't remember exactly where it was.)

On our way I talked to Csilla about a lot of things but unfortunately I can't remember much of this conversation in the retrospect of 20 years. What I remember is as the follows:

Csilla was a very modest, informal girl, free from delusions of grandeur, she was opened towards anybody. At the end of our discussion I asked her: "How many good friends do you have?" Csilla replied: "There are a lot who think they are my friends." Then I asked: "And how many friends do you have with whom you can share your sorrow?" After a few seconds she answered: "None."

I remember this moment well because her respond surprised me very much; it was hard to believe it. During the whole chat I got the impression that Csilla was sad for some reasons but, of course, after such a short period of acquaintance I didn't ask her about the reasons. It would have been indiscretion.

Approximately a month later I heard the sad news, which really shocked me. I recalled every detail of our conversation if anything could help to explain why she had done it the only thing I could think of was the fact that Csilla looked very sad and lonely that night. I wouldn't have ever dreamt that the situation was so severe.

Regards,

G. Lévai
1st June,2005

Dear Visitor!

If you knew Csilla Andrea Molnár personally or met her somewhere,
please share your memories and thoughts with us and our visitors. Please send your e-mails to the address:
info@molnarcsilla.hu